<div dir="ltr"><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">All, </div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">For added clarity, I propose the following change:</div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><b><u>Original Language in Revised Bylaws</u>:</b></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default"><font face="times new roman, serif"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">the Corporation shall, except as limited by Article 54 hereof, pursue the charitable and public purposes of lessening the burdens of government and promoting the global public interest in the operational stability of the Internet</span><span style="font-size:15.3333px"><font color="#ff0000"><b>,</b></font><font color="#000000"> </font></span><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">as such global public interest may be determined from time to time by the multistakeholder community through an inclusive bottom-up multistakeholder community process</span><span style="font-size:15.3333px"><font color="#ff0000"><b>,</b></font></span><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px"> by carrying out the mission set forth in the bylaws of the Corporation</span><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px"> (“</span><b style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">Bylaws</b><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">”).</span></font></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><span style="font-family:arial,sans-serif;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px"><br></span></div><div class="gmail_default"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0)"><b><u><font face="verdana, sans-serif">Proposed Language</font></u><span style="font-size:15.3333px">:</span></b></span></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><span style="font-family:arial,sans-serif;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px"><br></span></div><div class="gmail_default"><font face="times new roman, serif"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">the Corporation shall, except as limited by Article 54 hereof, pursue the charitable and public purposes of lessening the burdens of government and promoting the global public interest in the operational stability of the Internet </span><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">by carrying out the mission set forth in the bylaws of the Corporation</span><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px"> (“</span><b style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">Bylaws</b><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px">”). </span><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px"><i>Such global public interest may be determined from time to time. Any determination of such global public interest shall be made by the multistakeholder community through an inclusive bottom-up multistakeholder community process.</i></span><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px"><br></span></font></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Basically, what I've done is to remove the long inserted phrase about determining the GPI (between the two red commas in the original language above) and then try to "unpack" that phrase into sentences. Thrusting this phrase in the middle of the sentence was clearly causing two comprehension problems, even though the drafting was technically correct. In addition to the previously discussed comprehension problem around the word "may," the mid-sentence insertion of the phrase obscured the connection between the final words ("by carrying out the mission...") and the thought that it was completing ("the Corporation shall ... pursue the charitable and public purposes of [x] and [y]..."). Removing the inserted phrase makes the primary narrative thrust of the sentence clear: "<b>the Corporation shall ... pursue the charitable and public purposes of [x] and [y] by <span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:15.3333px;font-family:arial,sans-serif">by carrying out the mission set forth in the bylaws.</span></b>"</div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">[Note: I'm using "x" and "y" instead of the actual language to make the sentence shorter and easier to follow.] </div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Lawyers love long sentences (I've seen some go on for 20 lines or more), and they love inserting explanatory or qualifying phrases in the middle of the sentences, such as this phrase inserted solely to show how such phrases are inserted, so that such sentences can run on. Lawyers will also use the word "such" in a somewhat futile effort to indicate that the word following (in this case, "sentences") was already used in the sentence and is being referred to again with the same meaning. These drafting habits unfortunately make following the main thread of a sentence increasingly difficult. They also force awkward phrasing of the inserted clauses, since these clauses have to be drafted as referential fragments, rather than self-sufficient sentences. Ultimately, readability and clarity of meaning suffers.</div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">I hope that my suggested change clarifies the main thread of the sentence, and also clarifies the meaning of the inserted phrase.</div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br></div><div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Greg</div></div><div class="gmail_extra"><br><div class="gmail_quote">On Wed, Jul 6, 2016 at 8:38 PM, Trang Nguyen <span dir="ltr"><<a href="mailto:trang.nguyen@icann.org" target="_blank">trang.nguyen@icann.org</a>></span> wrote:<br><blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0 .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">
<div style="word-wrap:break-word;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:14px;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif">
<div>All,</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>The ICANN restated articles of incorporation is not on the critical path so we are able to accommodate an extension of the public comment period. The close of the public comment period has been extended to 13 July.</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>Trang</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<span>
<div style="font-family:Calibri;font-size:11pt;text-align:left;color:black;BORDER-BOTTOM:medium none;BORDER-LEFT:medium none;PADDING-BOTTOM:0in;PADDING-LEFT:0in;PADDING-RIGHT:0in;BORDER-TOP:#b5c4df 1pt solid;BORDER-RIGHT:medium none;PADDING-TOP:3pt">
<span style="font-weight:bold">From: </span>James Gannon <<a href="mailto:james@cyberinvasion.net" target="_blank">james@cyberinvasion.net</a>><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Date: </span>Wednesday, July 6, 2016 at 2:24 PM<br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">To: </span>Greg Shatan <<a href="mailto:gregshatanipc@gmail.com" target="_blank">gregshatanipc@gmail.com</a>><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Cc: </span>"Gregory, Holly" <<a href="mailto:holly.gregory@sidley.com" target="_blank">holly.gregory@sidley.com</a>>, Thomas Rickert <<a href="mailto:thomas@rickert.net" target="_blank">thomas@rickert.net</a>>, Mathieu Weill <<a href="mailto:mathieu.weill@afnic.fr" target="_blank">mathieu.weill@afnic.fr</a>>,
"<a href="mailto:leonfelipe@sanchez.mx" target="_blank">leonfelipe@sanchez.mx</a>" <<a href="mailto:leonfelipe@sanchez.mx" target="_blank">leonfelipe@sanchez.mx</a>>, Accountability Cross Community <<a href="mailto:accountability-cross-community@icann.org" target="_blank">accountability-cross-community@icann.org</a>>,
Bernard Turcotte <<a href="mailto:turcotte.bernard@gmail.com" target="_blank">turcotte.bernard@gmail.com</a>>, Trang Nguyen <<a href="mailto:trang.nguyen@icann.org" target="_blank">trang.nguyen@icann.org</a>>, Yuko Green <<a href="mailto:yuko.green@icann.org" target="_blank">yuko.green@icann.org</a>><div><div class="h5"><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Subject: </span>Re: [CCWG-ACCT] CCWG-Accountability - Draft Comment for Public Consultation on Articles of Incorporation (AOC)<br>
</div></div></div><div><div class="h5">
<div><br>
</div>
<div>
<div style="word-wrap:break-word;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:14px;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif">
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<div>
<div>Hi All,</div>
<div>In light of this and some other conversations I think that we need to take at least 24hours to review this comment and ensure that it is a consensus comment of the CCWG before we file it, Im not sure if a 24-48hr delay in the filing of the CCWG comment
would have a major impact downstream in the timelines, I have cc’d Trang and Yuko who may be able to respond to that.</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>I think that we may have let the AoI slip under our radar a little with all of the parallel work that is going on and we need to make sure that we get this comment correct first time and to do that we nee to do it with a full set of inputs and considerations
by the CCWG members and I don’t feel we have this yet. I know that we are working to tight deadlines, but we need to make sure that we do this right.</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>-JG</div>
<div>
<div></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<span>
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<span style="font-weight:bold">From: </span>Greg Shatan <<a href="mailto:gregshatanipc@gmail.com" target="_blank">gregshatanipc@gmail.com</a>><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Date: </span>Wednesday 6 July 2016 at 21:45<br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">To: </span>James Gannon <<a href="mailto:james@cyberinvasion.net" target="_blank">james@cyberinvasion.net</a>><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Cc: </span>"Gregory, Holly" <<a href="mailto:holly.gregory@sidley.com" target="_blank">holly.gregory@sidley.com</a>>, Thomas Rickert <<a href="mailto:thomas@rickert.net" target="_blank">thomas@rickert.net</a>>, Mathieu Weill <<a href="mailto:mathieu.weill@afnic.fr" target="_blank">mathieu.weill@afnic.fr</a>>,
"<a href="mailto:leonfelipe@sanchez.mx" target="_blank">leonfelipe@sanchez.mx</a>" <<a href="mailto:leonfelipe@sanchez.mx" target="_blank">leonfelipe@sanchez.mx</a>>, Accountability Cross Community <<a href="mailto:accountability-cross-community@icann.org" target="_blank">accountability-cross-community@icann.org</a>>,
Bernard Turcotte <<a href="mailto:turcotte.bernard@gmail.com" target="_blank">turcotte.bernard@gmail.com</a>><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Subject: </span>Re: [CCWG-ACCT] CCWG-Accountability - Draft Comment for Public Consultation on Articles of Incorporation (AOC)<br>
</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>
<div>
<div dir="ltr">
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">It's unfortunate that we don't have time to run this by our counsel, as I would be interested in their views. Here are mine.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">I would recommend against filing these comments.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">FIRST, I disagree with the second point raised. Substituting "shall" for "may" would incorrectly imply that there is a
<u>requirement</u> that a determination of the global public interest <u>must</u> take place. We have not asked for such a requirement and we have not specified any such requirement, which would render this statement nebulous, ambiguous and undefined. As
currently drafted, <i>if</i> a determination of the global public interest takes place it will be done by the multistakeholder community using a bottom-up multistakeholder process, but there is (properly) no language
<u>requiring</u> that such a determination be made.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">If anyone believes that Final Recommendation 1, para 51
<u>requires</u> the initiation of a process to determine the global public interest, that should either be a part of Work Stream 2 or a huge implementation item for Work Stream 1. As far as I can see, it is neither -- which further proves that changing "may"
to "shall" goes beyond the recommendations of the CCWG.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">SECOND, I also disagree with the third point raised. "Organized" is commonly used in Articles of Incorporation (indeed, in some states, such as Massachusetts, a non-profit corporation files Articles
of Organization rather than Articles of Incorporation). As our counsel pointed out on the last call, the California official form for Articles of Incorporation uses the term "organized." (See attached) It is a best practice to stick closely to the official
language provided by the jurisdiction -- here it is "organized." This is demonstrated in model California Articles of Incorporation prepared by Public Counsel, a pro bono law firm, and available online (see attached or
<a href="http://www.publiccounsel.org/publications?id=0059" target="_blank">http://www.publiccounsel.org/publications?id=0059</a>). It would be far preferable if we were to accept the clarification that "organized" is what's used in this circumstance, rather than to recommend
a change that is at best meaningless and at worst creates the potential for confusion (since one always looks for meaning in any change, and confusion could fill the void created by the meaninglessness of this change). To paraphrase Shakespeare, I don't think
the confusion is in the document, it is in ourselves (or at least in some of us) -- and it would be better for us to adjust our understanding of the document, rather than to adjust the document to suit our misunderstanding.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Of course, the language of the CCWG comment is relatively undemanding -- we only ask that "counsel" (whose counsel? ICANN's?) or "the drafters" (why the difference?) review the language. We
do not justify our quasi-recommendations of changes, other than by saying that we are confused by the word "organized" and by demonstrating that we are confused about what is permissive and what is required.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Frankly, I'm far from sure that this comment is widely supported, other than by apathy or lack of time. I think it would be a mistake for either of these two recommendations (?) to be adopted,
and I hope that counsel/the drafters, upon further review, let the original drafting stand.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">The only thing I agree with is the trivial change from "further" to "future," which at least does not make matters worse. This is hardly worth a comment by itself.<br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">In sum, I reiterate that I would recommend against filing these comments.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Best regards,</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Greg</div>
</div>
<div class="gmail_extra"><br>
<div class="gmail_quote">On Wed, Jul 6, 2016 at 3:49 PM, Greg Shatan <span dir="ltr">
<<a href="mailto:gregshatanipc@gmail.com" target="_blank">gregshatanipc@gmail.com</a>></span> wrote:<br>
<blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0 .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">
<div dir="ltr">
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">I agree. This is a legal document, and we should have the benefit of counsel on this.</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif"><br>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="font-family:verdana,sans-serif">Greg</div>
</div>
<div class="gmail_extra"><br>
<div class="gmail_quote">
<div>
<div>On Wed, Jul 6, 2016 at 3:36 PM, James Gannon <span dir="ltr"><<a href="mailto:james@cyberinvasion.net" target="_blank">james@cyberinvasion.net</a>></span> wrote:<br>
</div>
</div>
<blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="margin:0 0 0 .8ex;border-left:1px #ccc solid;padding-left:1ex">
<div>
<div>
<div style="word-wrap:break-word;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:14px;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif">
<div>
<div>
<div>While not able to certify anything, if there are issues that our counsel see I think its important that they are raised.</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>-James</div>
<div>
<div></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<span>
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<span style="font-weight:bold">From: </span><<a href="mailto:accountability-cross-community-bounces@icann.org" target="_blank">accountability-cross-community-bounces@icann.org</a>> on behalf of "Gregory, Holly" <<a href="mailto:holly.gregory@sidley.com" target="_blank">holly.gregory@sidley.com</a>><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Date: </span>Wednesday 6 July 2016 at 20:32<br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">To: </span>Thomas Rickert <<a href="mailto:thomas@rickert.net" target="_blank">thomas@rickert.net</a>>, Mathieu Weill <<a href="mailto:mathieu.weill@afnic.fr" target="_blank">mathieu.weill@afnic.fr</a>>, "<a href="mailto:leonfelipe@sanchez.mx" target="_blank">leonfelipe@sanchez.mx</a>"
<<a href="mailto:leonfelipe@sanchez.mx" target="_blank">leonfelipe@sanchez.mx</a>>, Accountability Cross Community <<a href="mailto:accountability-cross-community@icann.org" target="_blank">accountability-cross-community@icann.org</a>>, Bernard Turcotte <<a href="mailto:turcotte.bernard@gmail.com" target="_blank">turcotte.bernard@gmail.com</a>><br>
<span style="font-weight:bold">Subject: </span>Re: [CCWG-ACCT] CCWG-Accountability - Draft Comment for Public Consultation on Articles of Incorporation (AOC)<br>
</div>
<div>
<div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>
<div lang="EN-US" link="blue" vlink="purple">
<p></p>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">Dear Co-Chairs and CCWG-Accountability Members and Participants, Please let us know if you want Sidley and/or Adler to comment on this before you
post it. We will not do so unless instructed to. Holly<u></u><u></u></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"><u></u> <u></u></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><b><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)">HOLLY J. GREGORY</span></b><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"><br>
Partner and Co-Chair, Global Corporate Governance & Executive Compensation Practice<br>
<br>
<b>SIDLEY AUSTIN LLP<br>
</b><a href="tel:%2B1%20212%20839%205853" value="+12128395853" target="_blank">+1 212 839 5853</a><br>
<a href="mailto:holly.gregory@sidley.com" title="Click to send email to Gregory, Holly" target="_blank"><span style="color:blue">holly.gregory@sidley.com</span></a><u></u><u></u></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:Arial,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"> </span><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb(31,73,125)"><u></u><u></u></span></p>
<div style="border:none;border-top:solid #b5c4df 1.0pt;padding:3.0pt 0in 0in 0in">
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in"><b><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:Tahoma,sans-serif">From:</span></b><span style="font-size:10pt;font-family:Tahoma,sans-serif"><a href="mailto:accountability-cross-community-bounces@icann.org" target="_blank">
accountability-cross-community-bounces@icann.org</a> [<a href="mailto:accountability-cross-community-bounces@icann.org" target="_blank">mailto:accountability-cross-community-bounces@icann.org</a>]
<b>On Behalf Of </b>Bernard Turcotte<br>
<b>Sent:</b> Wednesday, July 06, 2016 3:27 PM<br>
<b>To:</b> Accountability Cross Community<br>
<b>Subject:</b> [CCWG-ACCT] CCWG-Accountability - Draft Comment for Public Consultation on Articles of Incorporation (AOC)<u></u><u></u></span></p>
</div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in"><u></u> <u></u></p>
<div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in">All,<u></u><u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in"><u></u> <u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in">Please find attached the draft comment to the ICANN public consultation on the Articles of Incorporation from the leadership.<u></u><u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in"><u></u> <u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:12.0pt;margin-left:.5in">
These comments are based on the questions raised during the CCWG meeting on the AOC and in consideration of Sam Eisner's response to those questions.<u></u><u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in"><u></u> <u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in">Please respond to the list ASAP if you have comments as this public consultation closes in a few hours.<u></u><u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in"><u></u> <u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in">Bernard Turcotte<u></u><u></u></p>
</div>
<div>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:.5in">ICANN Staff Support for the CCWG Co-Chairs.<u></u><u></u></p>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<p></p>
<p> </p>
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