[atrt2] ATRT2 Final Report - Draft#2 For Your Review

[Avri Doria]

H,

I don't know if draft2 is the latest, I thought there was going to be a 
draft3 after the one day review i missed.

On the recommendations for which i held the 'pen'

avri

Note  1   9.4b

b.	A discussion of the degree to which ICANN, both staff and community, 
are adhering to a default standard of transparency in all policy, 
implementation and administrative actions as well as in narratives, 
redactions or other  practices used to not disclose  information to the 
ICANN community, all documented in a transparent manner.

should be

b.	A discussion of the degree to which ICANN, both staff and community, 
are adhering to a default standard of transparency in all policy, 
implementation and administrative actions; as well as the degree to 
which all narratives, redaction, or other  practices used to not 
disclose  information to the ICANN community are documented in a 
transparent manner.

(this extended sentence was hard to parse based on punctuation and the 
lack of parallel construction)

Issue 2 9.4ci


i.	requests of the Documentary Information Disclosure Policy (DIDP) 
process and the disposition of Board Book  requests.

should be

i.	requests of the Documentary Information Disclosure Policy (DIDP) 
process and the disposition of requests.


(i.e. drop the spurious board book reference that did not get properly 
deleted from a previous edit.)