[Rt4-whois] Final version - proof-read

[Kathy Kleiman]

Hi Emily,
I wanted to share that I think your edits are excellent, and 
particularly like the edits to Chapter 4.  I never thought I would say 
it, but I think we are ready for launch.

Best,
Kathy


> Hi all
>
> I attach a mark up showing my final edits to the Draft Report, which 
> we will be publishing on Monday.
>
> You can see my changes.  They are mainly correction of typos, adding a 
> couple of footnote references, and making sure that we are using terms 
> consistently.  I also split the report into three parts (Part I: Scope 
> and definitions; Part II - WHOIS Policy and implementation and Part 
> III - the extent to which WHOIS policy and its implementation are 
> effective in meeting stakeholder needs).  I found that this made it 
> easier to see how the pieces of the jigsaw fit together.
>
> There are a couple of more substantive changes:
>
> 1. Recommendations - As agreed on the list, I have unhighlighted (ie 
> confirmed) the best practices recommendations re proxies, and inserted 
> the introductory text proposed by Susan and amended by me.
> 2. Recommendations - given the late controversy on whether the 
> interface should be for all gTLDs or just thin ones, I have put in two 
> alternatives for public comment, as proposed by Peter, and have added 
> a sentence near the introductory text on proxies.
> 3. Recommendations - Lutz's add on consumer outreach I have added into 
> the paragraph below where it was - I am unaware of any opposition to 
> this addition, or even when it was made, so shout if you have objections.
> 4. Recommendations - A few days ago, given the discussion of the words 
> "registrar-operated" in recommendation 10, I proposed their deletion.  
> I heard no opposition, and have deleted them.
> 5.The order of the chapter on implementation (which I wrote) I found 
> annoying, and not sufficiently clear because it has suffered from 
> being moved back and forth from the main report to the more detailed 
> letter in the appendix.  I have therefore made a few changes there, 
> which are marked up.  These should be uncontentious - the aim is to 
> explain what's going on rather than introduce substantive changes.
>
> Please give any final final edits to me and Alice/ circulated to the 
> list by the end of the weekend.
>
> Alice -- you will see that I've managed to muck up some of the 
> formatting (in particular I could not get the title for PART III to 
> appear on the same page as the next chapter heading, so gave up).  
> Please can you also update the table of contents.  On Monday, if no 
> more comments have been made, please accept all the marked up changes, 
> and publish the draft report.
>
> I will also forward an outline of our proposed cover note/ request for 
> comment.
>
> Kind regards
>
> Emily
>
> -- 
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