[Rt4-whois] Draft report - 24 Nov - please use this

Emily Taylor emily at emilytaylor.eu
Thu Nov 24 18:45:00 UTC 2011


Very nicely done, Alice.  Thank you.

My impression on quickly flicking through is that this is really taking
shape.  Thanks everyone for your tenacity and hard work, particularly over
the past month.  It's starting to pay off now.

I'm going to have a full read through over the next day or two, and will
send through some further suggested edits.

One that I can immediately see is that we should lose the whole "Compliance
Gap analysis" bit as it's duplicated in our letter to the Compliance Team.

Also, I think we need a "Conclusions" section before launching into the
recommendations.  If I may, I'd like to lift out the pre-amble "Findings"
done by Kathy/Bill/Peter in Dakar about privacy proxy, and add other bits
which introduce our recommendations.  Does anyone object?

Kind regards

Emily


On 24 November 2011 17:33, Alice Jansen <alice.jansen at icann.org> wrote:

> Dear Review Team Members,
>
>
> First of all, Happy Thanksgiving to our US Members :-). May you enjoy this
> day with your loved ones (and the turkey)!
>
>
> Please find attached the following:
>
>    - Appendices – V1 – 24 Nov
>    - Draft report clean – 24 Nov
>
>
> As always, these documents are available at:
> https://community.icann.org/display/whoisreviewprivate/Draft+report
>
> Please make sure to read documents using print layout: Macs tend to switch
> to Notebook (unsure why but am looking into it). For any new edits, please
> use this version. Be kindly reminded to stop using track changes (per the
> decision reached during your call yesterday) and to insert your
> contribution directly into the text while making sure to add your initials
> and to highlight it (color code: yellow). You will find an example page 2
> (thanks, Emily! :-)).
>
> Also, I have noticed this placeholder " The roles and responsibilities of
> contracted parties" in the Gap Analysis section and am unsure what it
> should entail and whether it still needs to be there. Could anyone
> enlighten me?
> It may have been superseded by later drafts…
>
> Thanks for your help,
>
> Kind regards
>
> Alice
> --
> *Alice Jansen*
> Assistant, Organizational Reviews
> *6 Rond Point Schuman, Bt.5*
> *B-1040 Brussels*
> *Belgium*
> Direct dial: +32 2 234 78 64
> Mobile: +32 4 73 31 76 56
> Skype: alice_jansen_icann
>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> Rt4-whois mailing list
> Rt4-whois at icann.org
> https://mm.icann.org/mailman/listinfo/rt4-whois
>
>


-- 




*
*

76 Temple Road, Oxford OX4 2EZ UK
t: +44 (0)1865 582 811 • m: +44 (0)7540 049 322
emily at emilytaylor.eu

*www.etlaw.co.uk*

Emily Taylor Consultancy Limited is a company registered in England and
Wales No. 730471. VAT No. 114487713.
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: http://mm.icann.org/pipermail/rt4-whois/attachments/20111124/e316ce8e/attachment.html 


More information about the Rt4-whois mailing list