[Rt4-whois] Clean copy

[Emily Taylor]

Hi Alice

Great work - we are nearly there.

I have a couple of points on the consolidated draft:

Exec Summary - reading well - I think we should include the recommendations
here, for an encapsulated document which  99.9% of people who look at this
report will be reading.
P 9 - Lynn made a table of contents for insertion after the Executive
Summary.  This is a good idea, and if we adopt it, we can delete Kathy's
insertion on p9 and go back to her original para.

P29 - the Dakar versions (of proxy/privacy definitions) to be used
throughout please

p44 - please move the highlighted text into an appendix

Chapter 8 (the GAP ANALYSIS) - this is important, is an older version that
was superseded yesterday.  This is the latest version.  I've removed all
the highlighting. It divides the Gap analysis into two (Chapter 7 - or
whatever the correct number is - Understanding the needs of stakeholders)
then we put in the consumer trust text after that, then move on to Chapter
8 (or whatever number it is) which should be Gap Analysis/Conclusions. Bill
is currently reviewing that language.

Kind regards

Emily



On 30 November 2011 16:31, Alice Jansen <alice.jansen at icann.org> wrote:

> Dear Review Team Members,
>
> Please find attached the latest versions of the master document and
> appendices. (clean copy – 30 November 16:30 UTC – Alice Jansen)
> Since I have applied formatting suggestions Kathy emailed me to the
> document, I would be very grateful if penholders of chapters could please
> check the formatting structure of their chapters. Does this match your
> train on thought? If not, please email me asap so that I can rectify it for
> the subsequent version.
> Documents will be available on the wiki in a couple of minutes.
> The files need additional work (typo hunting etc) but I would be very
> grateful if you could please read these documents very carefully and flag
> any missing piece of information or inconsistency you notice.
>
> Many thanks in advance,
>
> Kind regards
>
> Alice
>
> --
> *Alice Jansen*
> Assistant, Organizational Reviews
> *6 Rond Point Schuman, Bt.5*
> *B-1040 Brussels*
> *Belgium*
> Direct dial: +32 2 234 78 64
> Mobile: +32 4 73 31 76 56
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>
>
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>


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